Mama Raw

— 1 —

My husband hunts, as do many of our friends and relatives.  I’ve never understood the sense of satisfaction that comes with shooting a buck or bull elk with a large number of points.  I mean, that animal is no faster or harder to track or harder to spot through binoculars or harder to kill than one with fewer points, right?  So what’s the big deal?

— 2 —

Today I put my three-month-old in nine month size clothes.  There was a sense of accomplishment that came with it, in knowing that I’ve grown such a big, healthy baby.  It was almost like I’d shot an 8-point buck or something.

— 3 —

I recently read that people generally enjoy anticipating a vacation as much as they enjoy the actual vacation.  I used to obsessively read, think, and plan for our trips (you know, back before kids, when we actually went places together).  And it’s true, I think I might have had as much fun reading Lonely Planet guides as I did riding on forty-year-old, fowl-filled school buses in Guatemala or ordering zwei bratwursts in Germany or going to that beach on St. Martin full of middle-aged nudists with no tan lines and presumably full-time bikini area waxers on staff.

— 4 —

Maisie has been busy the last few days anticipating Christmas.  While she understands that she can’t open the presents under the tree until Sunday, she has been working hard organizing them, lining them up across the living room floor, and stacking them on the coffee table.  I hope she enjoys her gifts at least half as much after she’s unwrapped them.

— 5 —

With school out for two weeks and friends busy with holiday-ness, Maisie, Elias and I have been keeping it simple at home.  We’ve been on long walks, splashed in puddles, ridden tricycles, painted with watercolors, painted wooden Christmas tree ornaments, sang songs, baked muffins, baked cookies, and baked more muffins.  Simple is the new spectacular.

— 6 —

Two days ago, in the simplicity of our hours together, Elias and I found our sweet spot.  A merging of spirits and energies in which I was able to anticipate and meet his needs at the exact right instant without him having to fuss or cry to ask me to do so.  Alas, I could not hold onto it for longer than a day.

— 7 —

Magic.  I’m so looking forward to creating Christmas time magic with my kids, whether it be through Santa Claus, unique family traditions, or a combination of both.  I want them to feel bonded to our family in a way that will carry them throughout their days and to believe, no matter for how short a time, that anything is possible…that even the lit up, decorative reindeer moving their heads in the neighbors’ front yard are “looking at me!”

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